June 30, 2019

There are three things going on in my life right now which the torture group has interest in. They keep commenting on these topics. One: losing weight. Two: playing KeyForge. Three: the new ideas for a blog. With a bonus of the mundane comments about an upcoming event, I will be catsitting for a day.

Losing weight has long been a problem with me and my torture. For over twenty years the torture group wanted me to weigh in over my ideal weight. They would abuse me about my appearance. Vicious attacks. They wanted my outer appearance to match the words that they were saying. Now that I gained back twenty pounds of the fifty I had lost they put the talk of weight loss back into heavy rotation. Their abuse on the subject and their focus never wavered. I received the same abuse at a hundred-thirty-three pounds as I did fifty plus.

My day is full of abuse on the weight loss issue. They bring it up not just every time I am planning what to eat but all the other times they see an opportunity and when they feel it is right to “spontaneously” talk about. Three meals a day with hunger in between plus breaks in other torture which give the computer the signal to talk about a main topic which it is programmed to talk about more then others. I get a lot of this abuse. I don’t see why I get it because they control my body and what I eat. I’m not fat, I’m a torture victim. When I have control then I will lay claim to my physical appearance. Until then they’re playing a fallacious argument.

KeyForge is some kind of game my brother insists is learn as you go. I believe it is from the creator of the Magic card game. My brother plays both games. He involved me in the game but I have yet to play once. I have my decks and my kit and I’m awaiting the chance to secretly introduce the torture operator as my instructor. Without my brother knowing of course. They are excited. They want me to play. They think they’ll, we’ll, be good at it. They get trying to get a game started but circumstance has denied us for now.

They introduced an idea for a new blog focused on the torture and the torture victim community. The torturers may have planned this out but they didn’t know precisely how they were going to carry it out. I’ve been working on all this week. They said at first that they wanted to write about the torture from the schizophrenia perspective. But when writing mock-ups they couldn’t refrain from using the terminology on the torture they’d created and that I use in my writing. They deleted the first attempt at this new blog. It is a work in progress. They still think I should do something new.

Catsitting has developed from what was an imminent anxiety torture attack into a humdrum “I can handle this” attack instead. They prepared a plan. They know what I will eat, when I will smoke, how I will bathe and how I will spend my free time. They don’t know which family member will end up picking me up when I’m done but the bus is an option. They don’t think I’ll need to take the bus. They were a disorganized mess for a while on the catsitting. They were thinking the location wasn’t safe enough for me to smoke outside the building. Smoking is banned inside. They were thinking I would be stressed or rather they would attack me about my inability to smoke. They changed their plans and everything on the topic is calm and sorted.

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Published by ti30years

Living in So. California. Victim of the T.I. torture since 1990. Child and adult victim of the torture. I share my torture experience to help people learn about the torture which continues to plague me and others. Not your average schizophrenic.

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