Rock Your Body in Time

This fantasy music video is set to Harry Belafonte’s “Jump in the Line”. This was first shown to me sometime between 2009-2011. It was one of the many visual stories I saw then. This one takes a lot of background from my life.

I was in one dance class and the torture operators decided I should be balletic. I used to tap my foot like a ballerina they tell me. I stopped doing that as I grew up. I remember one day watching the gymnastics class at the park with envy. So the torture operator inserted into my torture the idea that gymnastics was a dream of mine. But I was too fat to do it they told me. They set up a goal and set down a roadblock. That is a tactic they use in my thought voice torture.

For years the daydreams about dance, gymnastics, the grace and the physical power continued. Until the day they needed a topic for a new music video and chose gymnastics. This was a surreal music video. Inspired by gymnasts I’d been watching during the recent Olympics and limited by the torture computer’s animation capabilities they showed scenes of physical feats I have never seen done. The key feature of the character was her superhuman ability to gain and sustain height in her floor routine. It was a comic book artists idea of gymnastics. She defied gravity.

It’s near impossible for me to describe the gymnastics the female character was doing because A) I don’t know the names and B) They changed the routine every time. I don’t have a music video memorized, I know many. There were to many versions of this. When my torturers created a music video it was intended to be replayed and altered as time went on. The computer could manage some of these scene changes; other work was done by the torture operator. It’s not unusual to see visuals of people in the torture. My  fantasy/music videos however were something unique because they were about me and the torturers.

Analysis: The torture group sees in me a little girl destined to be a great, graceful and powerful…little girl. They show a child’s sport and a disturbed one at that. They see me as physically strong. They imagine what I might imagine. It’s not a very grown-up perspective of me. I took that ballet class over twenty-five years ago. The torture group hasn’t learned to see me as a mature adult yet. Having watched me grow up with them the adults in my life this isn’t unusual for normal people. But these were my torturers, my rapists and my kidnappers.




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