The torture group found so many ways to enjoy the torture they were doing for the first year of schizophrenia. Their control over me meant even more they could create the perfect game to play out. I did some crazy things that never would have been allowed otherwise.
The premise for the first four months was that I had a psychic connection to Jakob Dylan. Which meant I wanted it to go away. They had me try a few tricks the first week or so to sever the connection.
I was outside smoking in the dead of night when Jakob suggested I might try knocking myself out cold. I set down my cigarette and walked to the grass. I turned around and let myself fall. I hit the ground and unwillingly pulled my head up at the last second. I tried again. Three times I jerked my head up avoiding a hard blow.
The torture group wasn’t going to hurt me. That way.
Another time I was told to try beating it out…of the ground. I took a spare shovel handle and swung it against the ground until it broke. It didn’t work.
This was a weird and unusual year full of torture like I had never had before. I did, said and went places I’d never gone before.