The torture group has controlled me. The torture group has created who I am in this presentation of me to others. And other people like me. They tell me I’m smart. They notice how kind I am. Generally people like me. Which leaves me flabbergasted. The torture group has won points for their positive use of control of my body in this realm of use. If one were to forgive the negative behaviors that occurred as well that is.
I’m getting this information from what other people tell me. My parents, therapists, homeschool teachers and those random people from my past that I bump into. I’m also told this by my torturers. Naturally they would approve of their own work. But I think sometimes they forget I’m fully automated and look at me ad if I were a person they know. They get so disturbingly friendly with me.
The personality the torture group has constructed for me is the not the take charge type but the do what others say or suggest is right type. I’m my father’s right hand gal around the house. I’m a housemouse and a housemaid. I’m the errand boy. I’m forever conceding my power. Because this allows the computer controlling my body to follow others lead and maintain their standard of normal. It doesn’t understand what to do well enough to be in charge. It gets “worried” and doubts itself. It requires constant guidance.